Still , in those dreary days , I've found great individuals - great friends . And they have made school life less boring . I guess I should just thank them , because what they've done for me , been through with me , and time they spent for me is definitely a need to mention . So thank you , Mosquito , Gorilla , Zebra , Cuckoo , Gauhrie , Ian , Ziwei , Filbert , Ken , Yak , Giraffe , Squirrel ! If you haven't appeared , I would probably not even have survived one week in school . Really love you loads ! ;)
2011 - The year I met you . I've have had fun with you , laughed with you , and formed memories with you .
However , I've never once seen you being sad when with me . Of course , that's great that you're being happy (I honestly hoped so , but of course I'm wrong once again) , because there were worries , problems concealed expertly beneath that mask of happiness . Don't get me wrong , I didn't mean it in a critical way because I'm sure you've had fun too(If you hadn't , then I have honestly failed as a person to not realize that earlier).
Conservative . Yes conservative is what you are . It isn't necessarily a negative trait - in fact , it's great . Because you can keep secrets well , and only reveal what you want others to perceive you as . It allows you to have duo-personalities . It allows you to adapt to situations very well . And yes , you know that already .
Conservative . Yes conservative is what you are . It isn't necessarily a negative trait - in fact , it's great . Because you can keep secrets well , and only reveal what you want others to perceive you as . It allows you to have duo-personalities . It allows you to adapt to situations very well . And yes , you know that already .
It could hurt people too .
I've been hurt , pained . Yes , I don't deny that because you could see that . There isn't a need to fake something that is real . Just so you know , I have two sides of me too . The chirpy side shows 90% on the outside , and the other , rarely seen except to my extremely close friends , maybe once ?
You said you hurt me , and that you're sorry . And you said you should have told me earlier to reduce the impact of the words . It's these instances where I get really frustrated , and after thinking for a day , I feel even more annoyed now . You tend to push people away whenever they get too close , and yet you felt that you should have told me earlier . That's ironic . The reason why you didn't tell me earlier was because you didn't feel that I was too close to you and thus , no need to push me away . It's as simple as that . Then why , are you even apologizing ? It's your personality , your true self that is showing itself when you push me away , and that's what makes you , you . There is no need to apologize for being yourself . The reason why we've been hurt is because we have become close enough to feel the pain . If we were ordinary acquaintances , those words would not have an effect .
We , are closer than ordinary friends . This , will not change no matter what happens .
You need to tell someone your worries . This will sound stupid coming from the person that hurt you , but please , tell your siblings everything . They are the closest to you , most dear to you and most trustworthy to you . You have your own problems and now , it is time to reveal them . There must be reasons for you to have this protective barrier around you , reasons for you to be wary of people , reasons for you to have two personalities . I can't say for sure what it is but if there is that word - Fear . You are fearful of people because they can hurt you with practically everything . It's true , isn't it ? It doesn't take a person who lives with only one parent long to figure that out . I've seen it happen - the heartbreak , the tears , and the nights spent in solitude praying , wishing that it wasn't a dream . Because when people you hold dear to you suffers , you automatically suffer with them , that's how we are connected . As you suffer , I suffer too . Vice versa .
Deleting your blog won't delete your worries . Your blog is currently , your only way to express your other side . Even if it isn't enough to vent your emotions , it still allows you to relax a little . Life doesn't work like deleting a blog . You can't delete people , objects in real life . Also , that only means you want to run away from reality . Yes , it hurts , because this is the new year and here I am , 'chiding' you on your actions . Still , I will chide you , scold you , just to get the message across . If you want to solve a problem , confront it . You've watched Digimon before , haven't you ? When the main cast faces with a tough opponent , they don't escape but face the enemy , with that trust they have for each other .
It's the same . If I'm the problem , confront me . If you are the problem , confront yourself . If both of us are the problem , then both of us confront it , together . Of course , it is easier said than done . And that is why , as I've always mentioned , I'll be there for you .
You said you hurt me , and that you're sorry . And you said you should have told me earlier to reduce the impact of the words . It's these instances where I get really frustrated , and after thinking for a day , I feel even more annoyed now . You tend to push people away whenever they get too close , and yet you felt that you should have told me earlier . That's ironic . The reason why you didn't tell me earlier was because you didn't feel that I was too close to you and thus , no need to push me away . It's as simple as that . Then why , are you even apologizing ? It's your personality , your true self that is showing itself when you push me away , and that's what makes you , you . There is no need to apologize for being yourself . The reason why we've been hurt is because we have become close enough to feel the pain . If we were ordinary acquaintances , those words would not have an effect .
We , are closer than ordinary friends . This , will not change no matter what happens .
You need to tell someone your worries . This will sound stupid coming from the person that hurt you , but please , tell your siblings everything . They are the closest to you , most dear to you and most trustworthy to you . You have your own problems and now , it is time to reveal them . There must be reasons for you to have this protective barrier around you , reasons for you to be wary of people , reasons for you to have two personalities . I can't say for sure what it is but if there is that word - Fear . You are fearful of people because they can hurt you with practically everything . It's true , isn't it ? It doesn't take a person who lives with only one parent long to figure that out . I've seen it happen - the heartbreak , the tears , and the nights spent in solitude praying , wishing that it wasn't a dream . Because when people you hold dear to you suffers , you automatically suffer with them , that's how we are connected . As you suffer , I suffer too . Vice versa .
Deleting your blog won't delete your worries . Your blog is currently , your only way to express your other side . Even if it isn't enough to vent your emotions , it still allows you to relax a little . Life doesn't work like deleting a blog . You can't delete people , objects in real life . Also , that only means you want to run away from reality . Yes , it hurts , because this is the new year and here I am , 'chiding' you on your actions . Still , I will chide you , scold you , just to get the message across . If you want to solve a problem , confront it . You've watched Digimon before , haven't you ? When the main cast faces with a tough opponent , they don't escape but face the enemy , with that trust they have for each other .
It's the same . If I'm the problem , confront me . If you are the problem , confront yourself . If both of us are the problem , then both of us confront it , together . Of course , it is easier said than done . And that is why , as I've always mentioned , I'll be there for you .
Because I care for you , because I worry about you , and because I love you .
Have a blessed and Happy New Year everyone ! :)
